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"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing in the world is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is a proverb.
Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent."
~ Calvin Coolidge
“The sweetest and most inoffensive path of life leads through the avenues of science and learning; and whoever can either remove any obstruction in this way, or open up any new prospect, ought, so far, to be esteemed a benefactor to mankind”
~ David Hume
Rhonda Begos Blog - 11-10-11
IAs more news comes out about what happened at Penn State, it really has turned a light on in my head about so many things. I just read the entire 23 page Grand Jury report, and I gotta tell ya, I am utterly disgusted. So many people failed these kids. So many, and it's scary... read more
Preventing Sexual Abuse
Prevention starts by breaking the
silence and secrecy that surrounds sexual abuse. This can happen by adults
having discussions about sexual abuse, keeping other adults accountable by
confronting or reporting... read more
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
Are you feeling desperate, alone or hopeless? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), a free, 24-hour hotline available to anyone in suicidal crises.... read more
Kids Matter, Inc.
We are people like you who want to restore opportunity to our abused and neglected youth in Milwaukee. We are parents and concerned citizens of all kinds - foster and kinship parents, birth parents and grandparents... read more
'Horrified' mother of Penn State victim wants 'justice'
University Park, Pennsylvania (CNN) -- The mother of one of the alleged sex abuse victims in the Penn State scandal said she was "absolutely horrified" by the developments and wants the perpetrator "to be put away for a long time."
"I want justice," the mother said on ABC's Good Morning America Friday, making reference to Jerry Sandusky, the former Penn State coach accused of sexually abusing youths.
"I want him to be locked up. There's no help for somebody who does this." Sandusky, who is free on bail, disputes the 23-page grand jury summary of graphic testimony, his attorney said.
Penn State remained embroiled Friday over the child sex abuse that led to the firing of legendary football coach Joe Paterno, with the board of trustees convening and a group of students planning a vigil in support of alleged abuse victims... READ MORE
"There is no better way to thank God for your sight than by giving a helping hand to someone in the dark."
- Helen Keller
"Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, it's at the end of your arm, as you get older, remember you have another hand: The first is to help yourself, the second is to help others."
-Audrey Hepburn
"The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them."
-Ralph Nichols
Every month, this page will feature a poem that has been written by a survivor. If you are interested in submitting a poem, please feel free to email the poem to rhonda_rhondabegos.com . Below are a few things you should know and a few things I will need:
1) Your poem remains your poem after sending.
2) Let me know what month you are submitting for.
3) Let me know if you would like to remain anonymous.
4) Let me know if you are interested in having your poem as a part of other survivor poetry that will be assembled for a book.
We all have different ways of dealing with abuse. My hope is this website will give people MANY options to cope. What better way to get there than by reading how other survivors have made it.
The 10 Rules Toward Understanding.docx
More Statistics Can Be Found By Visiting www.angelroar.com
1 in 4 girls is sexually abused before the age of 18.
1 in 6 boys is sexually abused before the age of 18.
1 in 5 children are solicited sexually while on the internet.
Nearly 70% of all reported sexual assaults (including assaults on adults) occur to children ages 17 and under.
An estimated 39 million survivors of childhood sexual abuse exist in America today.
84 percent of prison inmates were abused as children.
More than 20% of children are sexually abused before the age of 8.
Children who have been victims of sexual abuse are more likely to experience physical health problems (e.g., headaches).
Victims of child sexual abuse report more substance abuse problems. 70-80% of sexual abuse survivors report excessive drug and alcohol use.
Effects of child sexual abuse include guilt and self-blame, flashbacks, nightmares, insomnia, fear of things associated with the abuse (including objects, smells, places, doctor's visits, etc.), self-esteem issues, sexual dysfunction, chronic pain, addiction, self-injury, suicidal ideation, somatic complaints, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, other mental illnesses (including borderline personality disorder and dissociative identity disorder, propensity to re-victimization in adulthood, bulimia nervosa, physical injury to the child, among other problems. Approximately 15% to 25% of women and 5% to 15% of men were sexually abused when they were children. Most sexual abuse offenders are acquainted with their victims; approximately 30% are relatives of the child, most often brothers, fathers, mothers, uncles or cousins; around 60% are other acquaintances such as friends of the family, babysitters, or neighbors; strangers are the offenders in approximately 10% of child sexual abuse cases.
While childhood sexual abuse in and of itself is one of the most horrific and life damaging things that can be done to a child, what continues to haunt those of us who have been victims and are transferring to survivorship is the secret of this awful deed.
Society tells us when we are adults that we should "move on" or "forget about it already." People, family at times, friends and even churches often times fail those of us who are in search of help for the problems that we face in adulthood that we were not prepared for. I ask those who do not understand our plight, if we were given the choice to live a peaceful life, or to have all of these dysfunctional issues and behaviors follow us, which do you believe that we would choose? Of course, we would choose peace. For many of us without the proper help, peace is not a choice.
As stated in the website, www.angelroar.com , "Only recently, and only in particular countries and cultures, has the abuse of children come to be seen as a major social problem and a main cause of many peoples suffering and personal problems. Sexual abuse can produce a long term devastating impact on the victim. Abuse may lead to loss of trust, decreases in self esteem, development of shame, guilt and depression, substance abuse, suicide, promiscuity or prostitution, unfounded fear, and other behavioral issues.
In most cases, the victim never tells anyone about the abuse and the resulting behavioral issues are simply accepted or ignored. Since child sexual abuse is largely taboo, many do not understand or comprehend the severity nor commonality of the problem. In the United States, child physical, mental, and sexual abuse has reached epidemic proportions."
Once I was able to open the door to understanding where my behavior stemmed from, then and only then was I able to look past and through the debris to find this wonderful person underneath. All of us as victims, and as survivors are these wonderful people. Silence, and non-acceptance from the world in telling us that our abuse should not affect us in adultlife is what keeps those of us who have not sought the proper help, from asking someone for assistance. The best way in which you can help us, is by allowing us the right to say what happened, and then to be believed. There would be no other motive in finally speaking than to want to be helped.
Rhonda Begos Speaks
PO Box 26506
Wauwatosa, WI 53226
P:(414) 431-6621 F:(414) 431-3628
Email: rhonda_rhondabegos.com
